


ive heard of freaky fear monsters but this is riddikulus

by orphan_account



Series: The Pnat At Wizard School AU I Made When I Was 16 Is Still Fun Unfortunately JKR DNI [1]
Category: Paranatural (Webcomic)
Genre: Boggarts, Butch Lesbian Max Puckett, Gen, Hogwarts Sixth Year, Hurt/Comfort, Nonbinary Ed Burger, alternating pov, i changed the rating to teen but its only bc of swear words, pnat hogwarts au, ships/tags to be added, third year is there briefly in the first chapter but ch2-onwards is all year 6
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-15
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:56:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 18,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24742681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: She burst out laughing, shooting him a grin and a wink as she walked. Isabel reached the head of the classroom, backlit by the last edge of sun.“Just you wait! Hey, Max, how much d’you wanna bet the same lame dog comes out huh?” She sighed, hands planted on her hips as she shook her head. “There’s no challenge to that, it’s boring. I’ve grown, I’m not thirteen anymore!”Max gave her a thumbs down. “Oh, aren’t you? Coulda fooled me.”The wardrobe lock clicked.[abandoned]
Series: The Pnat At Wizard School AU I Made When I Was 16 Is Still Fun Unfortunately JKR DNI [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1789219
Comments: 11
Kudos: 16





	1. [ prologue : giant squid ]

Maxwell Puckett was 13 years old, and he was tired.

He was tired of almost falling to his death when the stairs decided to take the wrong turn.

He was tired of poltergeistic hands haunting his dorm room and stealing his books.

And whatever it was in the freaky pirate treasure chest Garcia was struggling to pull across the floor, Max had absolutely zero doubt in his mind that he was already tired of that too.

_(...Why was he pulling? They- they had magic. Why not just- ugh whatever who cares nevermind.)_

Warm light filtered through the tall classroom windows, a gentle breeze brushing leisurely through the air as a couple late third years managed to slip in unnoticed. The afternoon air was light and excited, leaving the room buzzing with ambient and curious chatter. Hushed questions passed between deskmates- _What’s with the box?_ And _Looks boring, you think Garcia’ll notice if we ditch?_ And _Nooo- this might be on the exam!_ And countless others Max didn’t catch. A quiet Hufflepuff slipped into their seat a couple chairs away from him.

Professor Garcia gave the box one final kick into place, an action Max watched him immediately regret as thin shoe collided with thick metal. Their professor released a string of curses, grabbing his foot _almost_ as quickly as Max saw RJ whip out their phone to snap a pic. When he was done grumbling Garcia turned to address the class, a frown still splayed on his face as he gave the box one last dirty look. 

“Okay, okay, _enough_ yapping.” He wove his arms down in an attempt to quiet the students. “Now I want everybody up. We’re moving the desks against the wall today. Gonna need the floor space.”

There was a unanimous groan as students stood, the creaking of table legs as they were lifted- _LIFT you brats, do NOT drag! Those antiques have decades on you!_ -up and over to the side arch of the chamber. Max just sighed and slid out of his chair. There was a cheerful hum next to him as Isabel did the same.

“Okay so-” She tucked some hair behind her ear as they turned to each end of their shared desk. “So usually Defence Against the Dark Arts is my favorite class anyway-” Her grin was bright and her eyes shone with excitement, “But a clear room? That means today’s gotta be something _extra cool,_ right?” She snuck a glance behind her shoulder to the front, cheery demeanor emphasized by the spring of her heels. 

“Isabel,” Max wheezed under the weight of the wood, “your muscles please. I cannot do this by myself and if you let go I’m seriously gonna get crushed. Every bone in my body. All of them.”

There was a snort, and his knees unbuckled as the weight eased off. After a moment Max realized he was able to let go completely. He turned to see her amused face, wand in hand as their desk hovered delicately several inches off the floor. “Seriously?” Isabel asked, her smile broad and eyebrow raised. “We watch Garcia struggle to pull that thing out from storage for like, a bajillion minutes, and you don’t even think about a levitation charm? Doofus.”

They strolled to the back, where an empty spot sat yet unclaimed by other students still struggling to carry their tables over. Isabel gently guided theirs as the pair walked. As they passed, other students seemed to take notice. Collin shook his head in exasperation as he and two Ravenclaws pulled out their wands to follow suit. Max felt a bump and snuck a side eye. Isabel’s smile seemed to be a bit prouder, a pleased little bounce added itself into her step. After several minutes of tetris-ing their spot as not to scrape the wood and call upon the wrath of their Professor, Isabel gently eased the desk down. 

She spun on her heel and gave Max a wink as she gave the top a good solid pat. “Okay, great job team!” 

A scoff as Max raised an eyebrow. “Team? Gee thanks, but you pretty much had that covered.” 

Her cheeks tinted, an embarrassed grin creeping onto her face as Isabel scratched the back of her neck. She coughed into her fist and waved him off good naturedly. “Hey, moral support is essential to any group effort!” And winked, “Now c’mon, let’s join the others.” Max sidestepped as she passed, waving him along while she ran back towards Ed. 

_(And he was the doofus? Please.)_

A couple students were still situating themselves, but the space had cleared significantly. Sun filtered through the large windows and splayed across the open floor. This wasn’t the first time he’d seen the classroom this way, but usually Garcia saved it for special occasions.

...Max _hated_ special occasions.

Almost every time Garcia introduced them to another Freaky Wizard Thing it had left him comically terrified, or on his butt, or blasted across the class, or worse. 

Yes every so often he thought they were cool. Yes sometimes he got to flex his skills and got to be the blast- _er_ and not the blast- _ee_. Yes he was still suspicious. No he was not taking questions. Please book any and all further inquiries through his secretary.

He wove between a trio of Gryffindors, ducked under another table, and cleared the last few students. Max jogged up to the opposite side of the class, where Isabel and Ed had joined up with Johnny and the goons under a window. From the looks of it one of them was trying to jump up and grab the ledge to sit on. 

Max caught Stephens eye as he got closer, who’d shoved the sleeves of his sweater up to his elbows and discarded his robe in what Max could only assume to be an attempt to climb better. The thrown heap of black and green fabric sat on the ground next to Ollie, who knelt with his hands locked in a foothold. Stephen waved his arms in some wild attempt of- coercion? A threatening display? Really it could have been either. 

“Ey, Puckett!” He dropped from his last attempt, arms pinwheeling. “You know these things, yeah? Jumpies? What’s the trick, huh? I _want_ that leverage.”

The exchange twisted Maxes face into something between a grimace and a scoff, an eyebrow raised. “Sure, and give away my dark secrets? You wish.” Stephen's shoulders sagged. Max sighed. “But, generally you’ve gotta get a running start.” He shoved his hands in his pockets, “Otherwise you don’t have momentum to push off the wall. Once you’re up high enough, _that’s_ when you grab it.” He rubbed the back of his head and gave the classroom a sweeping glance-

And caught Garcia's eye. His bloodshot, very unamused eye. Both of them actually.

Max stopped dead, smile freezing. “At least,” He added, “that is what I would tell you if we were not in a very serious learning environment. For learning. And not hooliganing around like rambunctious do-badders.”

The four bullies groaned, a chorus of _Laaaaaaaaaame_ ringing out despite the very pointed and strained and _forceful_ warning frown-grin Max was practically smacking them with. “Yeesh, you’re no fun.” Johnny whined, and Isabel hid her snort behind her hand.

“Jhonny! Oop! Stevens! Rael-Jesús!” The four flinched as Garcia’s voice shot across the room. “Come join the rest of the group so I can get this lesson over with and get to my _nap_.” His last word was emphasized with an overexaggerated yawn. “Guerra Puckett an’ Burger, you three too. Quit the conspiring.” 

The seven dejectedly made their way to the front of the room where the remainder of the class had gathered. Isabel stuck her tongue out as Johnny whispered something, then laughed. Ed hung back as RJ showed them their upgraded flip-phone and the latest camera mods they’d magic-ed it with. Ollie pushed them a path through a group of Slytherins, Stephen gleefully making a threatening motion their way before any could protest.

Professor Garcia cleared his throat. 

“Alright!” He stretched, back cracking as he grumbled something about needing a teaching assistant. “We’re covering a creature today, so no books. Or uh, desks.” Garcia nodded towards the wall. “All we need for today's lesson are your wand, and your guts.” A hand shot up in the crowd, and a pained look crossed their Professors face. “No, Jhonny, I do _not_ mean your literal guts.” The hand lowered.

He took a step back, and the class hushed. With Garcia out of the way the chest was on full display, and it made the room feel… Weird. Bad weird. Max shivered as a wave of unease filled the space.

When Max glanced sideways, Ed had latched a hand onto the sleeve of Isabel's robe. Like everyone, they looked nervous. “I dunno how good I feel about this one, fellas.” They said, eyebrows drawn in concern. “Somethin about that thing doesn’t feel great. Bad jubies.”

Isabel rested a hand on her brother's shoulder as her eyes flicked back to the head of the room. “They’ve got a point.” She chewed her lip and for a moment her expression looked almost… worried? She stole another glance in Ed’s direction and steeled, worried expression gone, instantly replaced by a warm and comforting smile. The hand on Ed’s shoulder moved down and gave their wrist a gentle squeeze. 

“Hey, hey.” Her tone was smooth and consoling, grin growing fiery as she stuck a thumb to her chest. “Whatever it is, it’s got no chance against me! I’ll kick its butt for you, ‘kay?”

Ed’s face grew easier, but as they opened their mouth to respond they were cut off as Johnny practically launched himself over their shoulder.

“Ha, as if! If anyone’s sending whatever creep-aura freak’s in that chest runnin’ home cryin, ‘s gonna be me! 

Isabel's face soured. “The only creep aura freak I see here is _you_ , Jhonny. And back off- Ed’s _my_ brother so _I’m_ sending it running!” 

His eyebrows raised as Johnny jerked an arm over Eds shoulders. “Nuh uh! Family don’t count here, they’re _my_ friend so if anyones sendin it runnin it’s gonna be _me!”_

The two kept bickering despite Eds’ muffled protests, and Max shot them a sympathetic look. They shrugged with a tired smile in response. Max hummed. Other students started giving their group annoyed glances, and he shot Ollie a pleading glance. Apparently he didn’t like the idea of detention due to class disruption any more than Max did, because before Isabel and Johnny could properly tear each other's throats out Ollie had placed heavy hands on their heads. Both looked about to complain but he saw Ollie frown sternly, and the two huffed into silence, arms crossed and bodies turned away. 

How tiring. 

Max went to whisper some smarmy comment, but paused as Johnny snuck a look back around in Isabel's direction. It lasted a moment before he realized Max had noticed, his ears going red as he dragged a thumb across his neck. Max just raised an eyebrow. He decided against pushing the topic due to rather enjoying not being a human shish kabob and turned his attention back to the front, where Garcia was still leading up to what the box actually _was_.

“-So now that I’ve fully explained, let’s begin.”

Oh. 

Oops.

Max looked back to the group, who had also realized they had missed Garcia's entire explanation lecture and was now instructing students to line up in front of the box. Their faces were pale and flushed with embarrassment, and it was very _very_ clear they heard exactly as much instruction as he did. Which was nothing. Nothing at all. Great.

He did a quick scan of the crowd, desperately eyeing for any saving grace, any hint, any-

“You weren’t listening, were you.”

The group muffled their collective yelp, heads whipping to the figure to their left. Dimitris amused look left them heaving a collective sigh of relief. 

“ _Jeez_ Danger, give a guy some warning before y’sneak up on him.” Stephen whined, his hands going up to comb out his hair. 

_(And... Fix his sweater sleeves? Ok.)_

Dimitri snorted and gave him a look over. “Sneak up? I’ve been standing here the whole time.” He replied, the fabric of his robe bunching as he shrugged. “Not my fault if you didn’t notice.” His attention turned back to Max with a well-intentioned casual smile. “But for real, you guys missed like... the whole intro. Not the smartest move.”

To say ‘all the energy went out Maxs’ body’ would imply that any was there in the first place, which there wasn’t, but any remaining emotion that was not _exhaustion_ was promptly repelled from his being. Max wiped a hand over his face. “Trust me,” he muttered, shooting the Gryffindor Beaters a glare, “it _wasn’t_ intentional.” The duo's faces went red, and Isabel studied something _very interesting_ on the wall. He turned back to Dimitri with a pleading look. “Is there _any_ way we can convince you to fill us in.”

Garcia had retreated to his office, most likely to grab his wand. Max figured if he left it on top of his neck pillow like he always did, they had about two minutes before he returned and they died. Or didn’t die. Not dying sounded best. 

Already their classmates had started murmuring hushed tones about, about- _UGH_ about Max didn’t _KNOW_ , and no matter how much he tried to eavesdrop there never seemed to be enough information to put together a solid idea. He gave Dimitri one last pathetic look. 

Dimitri, who looked at him sympathetically and gave Max a pat on the shoulder. “Chill, I’m not gonna let you drown.” He paused, scratching his face with his wand. “Uh, not literally anyway. Just consider yourself lucky ‘m not Lisa or Suzy, okay?” Max saw Ed shiver. Dimitri pocketed his wand and gave Garcias’ office a glance. “We’re going up against Boggarts.”

Ed frowned. “Like, the nose gunk? Gross.”

A fist shoved at their shoulder softly as Isabel nudged them. “No, dummy.” She said, “ _Not_ like the nose gunk. Boggarts’re these creepy weirdos that turn into whatever you’re most scared of. Hopefully that means zero snot involved.” 

“Oh.” Their frown didn’t worsen, but it didn’t exactly drop either. “Sounds... fun.”

There was a _hrmph_ as Johnny leaned past Eds’ shoulder, arms folded and curiosity bullheaded. “Hold up hold upholdup, Guerra.” Isabel poked him away with her finger, “How come you know this bunk, huh? Got some secret brain info you’re keepin in there?” Off to his side Stephen gave a deathly serious nod at the phrase _secret brain info_. 

She shoved his cheek with the palm of her hand, face going red. “What- No! I- I just! Read sometimes!” Isabels’ attention turned away as students glanced over. “It’s, the- the Library’s nice! Okay! lt’s nice there! Which you should _know_ , you _meathead_.” She warned. “You can find out a lot of _stuff_ there.” Isabel shot him a look and Johnny bristled.

Whatever that meant seemed to ward him off enough, and Max figured whatever weird blackmail threat Isabel was making he wanted _no_ part in it. 

“Uh. Anyways,” Dimitri gave him a confused glance that Max quickly shrugged off, “Isabel’s right, no snot junk.” He shook his head, and light caught in the bounce of his curls. “Though Garcia did say apparently it’s a pretty low-level one. Apparently he doesn’t want a bunch of traumatized 13 year olds.”

Ah. 

Okay.

Made sense.

But, still… A fear monster? Maxes face wrung up. He didn’t like that. He didn’t even really know what his worst fear _was_ , and he _still_ didn’t like that. The idea made him shiver, and he tugged at the sleeves on his robe. He glanced above, where a cloud had covered the bright sky. The breeze, slow and steady, had begun moving it gently across the blue as several streaks of light shone through. That didn’t do much for the atmosphere though.

Max took another peek at the chest. If it was home to some fear monster it certainly looked the part, that thing _oozed_ rancid vibes.

After Dimitri’s mention of their teacher, Garcia emerged. Success of finding his aforementioned wand seemed to do little to energize him as he made his way back from his office and had begun calling students into order. 

He cleared his throat. “Ohhh-kay! Back up, I’m gonna do a demonstration before I let you fend for yourselves.” The Hufflepuff at the head of class retreated as Garcia waved them back. “Remember,” he said, “this thing’s weak so it’s not actually gonna show you the worst thing you can think of, but that doesn’t mean it’s not a threat. When you approach the chest it’s important to stay calm and focused, even if it catches you off guard.”

Across the room the students nodded, several scattered _yes sir_ ’s sounding off. Garcia yawned again as he dug his wand out from his pants pocket.

“Now the trick,” Garcia tossed his robe onto a chair by the office door, “is that these things hate humor.” His stance widened, and Max recognized the pose- the defensive position from dueling training. “They’re huge downers, so the trick to protecting yourself is to bust out the funnies, an’ make fun of ‘em to absolute _hell_.”

Garcia flicked his wand.

And the top of the box creaked open.

The hinges creaked, and the temperature noticeably dropped. It wasn’t bad, but... It wasn't welcoming. A hush blanked the air, Garcia’s instruction had been the only noise and once he’d quieted the room had gone silent. In the large expanse of empty space the groan of the chest’s cover was loud and bold, the sound reverberating sharply off the high banisters of the tall ceiling.

Each student held their breath.

And held their breath.

...And held their breath.

A Ravenclaw to Max's right gave an annoyed exhale as they muttered “What’s the big deal? This is _so_ lame-”

They were cut off as a blur shot out from the chest. It whizzed past Garcia, who gave an agitated shout. A tendril, thick and strong, pulled itself up and over the edge. The students in the first row, Ravenclaw kid included, shrieked.

“That looks like-”  
  
“But it’s way too big for the box, there’s no way-!”

“ _EEEEK!!_ ”

Max whipped his head around to Isabel, who was looking back at him equally confused. He made a motion like: _What??????_ And she made a motion back like: _I dunno!!!!!!!_

But... Max had a sneaking suspicion he _did_ know. OK, he wasn’t 100% sure, but he could’ve _sworn_ he’d seen that same appendage before. Only a couple times: twice in the Slytherin common room and once in his dorm when he’d been trying to sleep. Both outside windows looking into the Great Lake. But that could only mean- 

“Giant Squid.” Garcia muttered bitterly through grit teeth.

Next to him, Johnny blinked. “Oh damn, course! Couple years ago, ‘fore we got here, my sister'd told me he-”

Garcia whipped around and Johnny shut up. Their Professor gave one more disgusted look at the lone limb whipping around, desperate to grab an ankle or something, before raising his wand.

“Alright now, eyes on me.” He addressed the class but kept his back to them, full attention on the creature. “It’s like I said: When confronted with a Boggart the key is to think of something humorous. Then when in range, stand strong and stay focused.” The tendril whipped around, nearly catching Garcia in its path. Max was pretty sure he saw him gag. Garcia shook the look off and continued the demonstration. “Once you’ve prepared your idea, raise your wand and cast the Boggart-Banishing Charm: _Riddikulus!”_

A sharp-

**_SNAP_ **

-shot from his wand and echoed through the room. Instantly the squid limb began to squeal and thrash, curling up as the smell of cooked seafood filled the air. In a moment, in the space the tendril had been was a plate of freshly fried Calamari. 

Garcia coughed, scratching his stubble. He gave the students a sideways glance and made some muttered comment about owing the Squid money. 

There was dead silence. Then, Cody broke out into giggles. He slapped a hand over his mouth, but it was too late. Several classmates busted into snickers with him until the whole class shook with laughter. 

At the head of the room the Boggart had retreated, lid snapping shut. “Alright! Who’s next?” Garcia’s tone tried to sound annoyed, but he didn’t hide the wisp of a smile on his face.

A flurry of hands went up as he instructed the students into single file.

Dimitri had since waved his goodbyes and joined Suzy and Collin over where they stood, their friend group standing just ahead of Max's. Professor Garcia had collapsed into the chair his robe laid on after making sure the first couple students got the pronunciation correct. It didn’t look like he was awake, but every now and then he’d peek an eye open to make sure things were going smoothly.

The next several minutes passed in a blur. Classmates whizzed by, each surpassing their mildly frightening fear with a steady offense. And an onslaught of jokes. Ed bounced on their heels as they watched Collin step up. The chest creaked, groaning ominously as he raised his wand and- 

And Isabel elbowed Johnny in the ribs, shooting him a whisper loud enough for their whole group to hear. “ _Watch it_ , doofus." She huffed, " _I_ might not care, but if Captain Heavens catches you swearing again and you get booted off the team and I’m stuck carrying your dumb replacements dumb weight you are _so_ done for!”

Johnny scoffed and nudged her back. Max and Ollie shared a pained glance. “Ohh no, don’t you go actin’ all uppity!” They were so tired.

**_SNAP_ **

Collins’ spell reverberated, Boggart whipping back into its chest. The line moved forward. 

“Besides,” Unfortunately, so did Johnny’s mouth. “I heard ya say it in the supply closet last practice.” His grin was wolfish and mean, but pink dusted under the freckles on his cheeks. Max weighed the pros and cons of bringing it up for leverage. Not worth the trouble.  
  
But Isabels’ face went bright red. “WH! WHUH, N-NO I DID _NOT!!_ ”

“Did too.”

“Did NOT!!!”

A Slytherin girl- _Who was that, Suzy? Was that Suzy? Yeah that was Suzy_ \- Was after Collin. Her body language was nervous and she kept fidgeting with her pants, but her face was set in determination. Despite her dread she reached back, tightened her pink scrunchie, and stepped forward. 

The crowd chattered quietly as the two kept their bickering. 

Isabel grabbed the fabric at Johnny’s shoulder and rocked them both back and forth as he laughed, “Jhonny I SWEAR if you get me in trouble with Captain Heavens I’m gonna kick YOUR stupid butt and not the monsters!”

Between them Max held up his hands. “Uh, guys,” He started, “Call me crazy but I really don’t think your quidditch captain’s gonna care if you curse? Like I’ve heard her mouth and it’s seriously-”

**_SNAP_ **

All four glanced at the noise, watching as Suzy’d furiously banished what appeared to be her own failed journalism career. Or rather, banished the Gigantic Inflatable Failed Journalist Balloon she had transformed her wailing future self into. Said balloon whizzed around the room once, twice, deflating noisily and pathetically until it dove into the chest. 

The lid slammed shut. With a spin and two fists pumped in the air, Suzys’ ponytail swung in victory. 

The three watched another moment before Johnny side eye’d Isabel, muttering under his breath, “Wonder what’d happen if Heavens heard about that, huh?”

“So help me Jhonny I will feed you to my spider.” 

Max frowned. Spider? Whuh? No, Isabel said last year Eightfold had-

“Miss Guerra! Miss Puckett! Mister Jhonny!”

They froze. 

Shit.

In front of them was an empty room, with a very annoyed Professor sending an impatient look their way. He motioned lazily with his hand, and Max realized they’d been so busy bickering they hadn’t noticed Suzy to be the one directly in front of them in line. Now that she’d gone-

“Sorry to interrupt your fascinating conversation,” Garcia's eye twitched, “but we have an activity to get on with. So if you don’t mind.” He exhaled, dragging a tired hand down his face.

They nodded, faces red and embarrassment plain and _yes professor_ and _sorry professor_ mumbled sheepishly. There was a series of eye movements and shoved shoulders and shaken heads as nobody was exactly _excited_ to go face the scary chest monster, but nobody had really been standing in any _order_ , so therefore _somebody_ had to go first. At his chair Garcia cleared his throat.

Max's shoulders relaxed as Isabel sighed and shrugged, taking the steps forward to separate herself from the group. He sent her a look that he tried to be sympathetic, but Isabel just gave him back a good natured scoff and an amused quirk of her eyebrow. 

“Ohhhh no,” she shook her head, “you’re not gonna kick me out to face the boogeyman and then try the sappy eyes!”

“Isabel have I mentioned today how effervescent your ensemble is? My goodness did you iron your tie.”

“Yeah this isn't getting you any favors.”  
  
“How sharply pressed the fabric... How lacking in wrinkles...... As is the job.. Of an iron…..…..”  
  
“Oh my goddddd you’re the worst friend EVER.”

But she wasn’t able to hide the smile, so Isabel promptly turned on her heel to face the box. For a second she seemed almost to hesitate, then turned back to give Max and the others a wink. When she turned back Isabel’d taken a deep breath and mirrored the defensive position Garcia had taken in his demonstration. Max couldn’t see her face from this angle, but he had no doubt it was alight with the manic, jittery grin she wore when challenged.

Sunshine from the window beamed directly onto the floor where she stood. It bounced off the dark brown of her hair, illuminating the surrounding area. Despite knowing the explained and demonstrated nature of the beast she was facing, Isabel stood braced and unwavering. 

The lock to the chest clicked. And creaked.

And Max heard the creature before he saw it.

Nobody had time to react as a growling, hulking mass of fur and foam hurled itself out into the classroom. It rushed forward on legs it was too heavy for, nails skidding across the floor and nearly into a group of Gryffindor girls. The group screamed and scrambled back, but the thing had no interest in them. It already had a target.

She’d turned to dodge when it had lunged her way, and Max could see her face now. 

Isabel had gone white. 

Her eyes were wide. The wand in her hand gripped so tightly her knuckles were pale. And she stared, unmoving. 

It's eyes- ( _eye)_ was a putrid yellow, the rancid color of pus boiling under heat. Max was grateful the other had been gouged out, ( _but maybe he wasn’t)_ because the scar in place of its second eye was rippled and nasty. The fur covering it was matted and unwashed, not to mention straight-up missing in some places, which was not doing it any favors. White drool lathered around its maw, slicking the floor with each clump to drip from its growling deathtrap of jagged teeth. 

It was immense, and it was horrifying, and all Max could do was watch as Isabel faced the gnarliest dog he had ever seen.

It steadied itself and violently shook its head. Students yelled out in disgust as gobs of white froth showered down and splattered onto robes. Max resisted the urge to gag, because this thing _seriously_ needed a breath mint. It smelled _bad_. Like, _‘sweaty-quidditch-uniform-that-hadn't-been-washed-in-months-and-also-my-roommates-cat-barfed-on-it-then-it-got-microwaved-on-high-and-ok-you-get-the-point’_ bad.

Behind him Max heard Johnny shriek something about his hair. There was the urge to glance behind him and see the damage, but Max stopped as the creature lowered its head and growled.

Nails scraped on the ground as it charged.

In the span of around 2 seconds, Isabels’ face went through several expressions at once. There was the initial shock and confusion that had left her frozen, the processing of the beast in front of her. 

And charged.

Then, the dawning of realization. The breath hitched in fear, the step back in terror. The almost subconscious way her free hand flew to hover over a spot on her stomach. The panic of facing an old trauma.

And charged.

Until finally something flipped. And Isabels expression got _angry_. Her stance widened, her face focused. The way her eyes glinted, daring, _inviting_ the boggart to give her its worst. In the split second the moment lasted her face was full of hurt and hate and pain and _challenge_ and _adrenaline_ and _come get it you snot nosed bulldozer_.

The dog pounced.

Isabel’s posture snapped as she lunged sideways, spinning on her heel to regain her balance to face the beast before it could leap again. The ground shook as the mutt landed. Irritated it got to its feet, furious at having been outwitted. It crouched, haunches coiling to spring forward, leaning back and preparing to pounce and, and-

_“Riddikulus!”_

**_SNAP_ **

-And Isabel was quicker. The spell reverberated through the stone acoustics of the classroom, the air ringing dully as her wand hit its mark with expert precision. She stood panting, brows drawn in heavy concentration. 

Several feet in front of her where the dog had stood was a perfectly harmless, gently bouncing, doe-eyed puppy bobblehead.

A bobblehead that she was still giving one _killer_ stink eye at.

Isabel marched right up to it, wand clutched in her fist, and blew a giant raspberry in its face. Its adorable plastic face bobbed mildly as she swatted it with her free hand. 

Somewhere behind him Max heard Ed cover a snort behind their hand. Goofy laughter bubbled up behind it until it was too loud to contain, good-natured guffaws sounding out openly as they supported their hands on their knees. It didn’t take long for others to join them. Stephen and RJ glanced at each other before instantly cracking up, leaning on Ollie for support. Johnny’s arms were crossed and his foot tapped in what Max _assumed_ was an _attempt_ of looking indignant and grumpy. Except that he did a horrible job at hiding the gleeful shine in his eyes, or the proud grin he kept failing to force down. A couple of the kids from behind their group caught along, until the entire class was snickering at the now less-than-ferocious boggart’s fate. 

Max caught Isabel’s eye as she turned back to check her friends reactions. He gave a theatrically overexaggerated roll of his eyes as the corner of his mouth twitched up in a subtle smile. He pulled down the brim of his hat and flashed her a thumbs up. 

Immediately her face lit up, face beaming with satisfaction and delight. She went to take a step forward, to run towards them and gush about the thrill and the rush, but Max watched as she paused. Her frown returned and she whipped around to give the toy on the ground one last dirty look. Isabel’s cheeks puffed out in distaste as she stuck her tongue out at the thing, giving it a mean _nyeeeeh!!!_ before darting in their direction. 

If Isabel shone going in, she radiated coming out. The glint of sun in her eyes as she raced back was self-assured, elated and maybe a little cocky. 

_(But Max figured maybe she deserved to be a little cocky.)_

As soon as she was within range Isabel was thrown back, Ed’s figure hurling itself into her space. “Izzy that- that was so _cool!!!!_ ” Their arms waved in a frenzy, “You! And then the-!” Isabel hugged her arms around Ed’s waist and lifted, both siblings laughing as she spun them in a circle. 

When she set them down Ed wiped at their nose with a sleeve, adjusted their glasses, and grinned lopsided. “But I knew you were gonna be fine, wouldnt’a thunk no-therwise.” Their face scrunched in concern, “Um. Just for checking though, you are right? Fine? All good? Hunkey dorey?”

Isabel gave them a kind look, eyebrows drawn up and one side of her mouth tilted in a smile. She looked about to respond before Johnny scuttled his way past Ollie’s arm. “Oh, _puh leeze!_ Course she is, Guerra’s taken me on, an’ I’m a beast!” He jabbed a thumb at his puffed out chest, “M’way freakier than that lame crypt creeper.” And stuck his tongue out, “Sides, when I banish _my_ whateverghost you’re gonna wish for a do over cause it’ll be so cool. How about that, _huh Guerra?_ ”

His taunt was met with a hard laugh and a full palm to push back his grinning face. Isabel challenged back, “Pfft! Yeah, you’re _definitely_ freakier than that dog. Even your hair’s worse!” She flicked her eyes up to the drool Max had previously forgotten to check, bit her bottom lip to hold back her giggles, moved her gaze back downwards, and promptly burst into another fit of hysterics at the shade Johnny’s face had turned.

He moved to grab her in a headlock. But Isabel ducked, still giggling, and sidestepped behind Max. She slung an arm around his shoulder for support, and he gave the top of her head an awkward pat. 

“But for real!” She continued, wiping a fake tear from her eye, “It’s cool, Ed. Besides-” Her fist came up to her mouth as she coughed out something that sounded roughly like _GAGHECKEURGHJOHNNYSRIGHTGHRG_ , “-I’m fine.”

Oh, sure. _Sure_. Look, Max had seen the size of that thing and he knew Isabel was tough and all, but _jee zuz_. If that ugly mug wasn’t enough to freak her out Max did _not_ want to meet what did. He hummed a cynical _mm-hmm_ and yelped when she pinched his ribs. Isabel leaned back to avoid the swat he aimed at her, then snatched his hat and smushed it backwards over her own hair.

“Okay, okay! Ugh!” Isabel rolled her eyes, ruffling the buzz on the top of his head. “MAYBE it had me for a second.” She huffed, “But it was just for a second! Look at me!” Her empty arm motioned, and the grin she wore mirrored the rays of light filtering through the glass outside. “See? Totally fine. That was the first-” 

Isabel’s face froze, smile turned to ice as her eyes stared cold and intense, “ **and last,** ”

Her cheery demeanor snapped back. “-time that thing’s gonna get the jump on me!” She chirped, face set in an assuring beam.

If Isabel’s energy ever ran out, Max wouldn’t know. Maybe she had a secret stash of illegal vigor potion from the wizard black market. Maybe she used dragon's blood as lotion. Maybe she was solar powered. Or something.

“Sure dude, whatever you say.” Max made a swipe for his hat. Again, Isabel avoided him with ease. He exhaled forcefully through the nose and pinched between his eyebrows, “Look, I'm just glad that after today, we never have to do this again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. yes stephens last name is stevens and yes rj's last name is a ref to that old pnat-confessions post  
> 2\. yes garcia owes the squid money dont worry about it  
> 3\. hi thx for reading :-)


	2. [ present : rejection / dysphoria / aquatic asphyxiation ]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> isaacs in this chapter. youre welcome
> 
> this chapter is 12k. what have i done. how did this happen. 
> 
> oh btw! for claritys sake, i mention a kid named morgan palmer a couple times through this series. it's the green themed blond haired background character with the squiggly hair from canon that we always see acting cool or being a chad. i just think theyre funny. ok thats all, enjoy! <3

“Settle down, y’little punks. Let's do this again.”

Three years later his feet found themselves standing on familiar ground.

Max Puckett was 16, and once again, he was too tired for this.

He was tired of his friends dragging him into the woods at ass o'clock at night. 

_(And then promptly getting themselves lost in said woods for an hour.)_

He was tired of being hoisted around as Super Special Hogwarts Champion.

_(Which really didn’t mean that much, unless you counted ‘partaking in Numerous Death Matches’ as Super Special, which Max personally did not.)_

And as Garcia pulled another, much larger wardrobe to the front of the classroom, Max was ten thousand percent positive that he was tired already of it. 

_(And also that he wanted to smack his head against the wall. If he was lucky, maybe he would sustain concussion.)_

Low light cast through the windows, telltale rain clouds drifting through the sky. It left the classroom dimmer, natural light substituted by the candlelit sconces lining the room. Soft shadows cast onto the floor as chilled morning air drifted through cracks in the old windows. Max pulled his sweater tighter.

It was going to rain soon- the ceiling at breakfast foreshadowed that much.

This time, the area had been cleared prior to arrival. By the time he and Ed had made their way to the third floor _(only mildly tardy! you can’t pass up snooping on Starchman’s first year charms classes- the guy goes all out!)_ Garcia had either moved all desks against the wall himself, or gotten their classmates to. Again. Either scenario had left the space sitting bare and open. 

Students milled about in friend groups normally prohibited by desk seating assignments. A group of Beauxbatons students stood under a window with friends they’d made in Hufflepuff, and Max gave an uncomfortable wave as he caught one of their eyes. He then promptly averted his gaze when the only response was the worsening of their scowl. Not friendly. Cool. 

Though the class size was larger than average years, individual groupings and lack of furnishings left the chamber feeling far too big and foreboding. Spacious. Vulnerable.

He wasn’t just tired. Something in the atmosphere made him uneasy. 

A cough snapped Max back to focus. When he turned, Professor Garcia had centered the wardrobe perfectly. He stood an uncomfortable distance away from it, face set in a look more attentive and stern than Max could recall dealing with previously. For once the guy actually seemed... present? Alert? 

Awake.

Yeah- that didn’t help with the uneasiness.

“Alright, shut your yaps and listen _up_.” Garcia started. “Some of you may be familiar with today’s exercise, but our guests this year likely aren’t. So! That being said, we’re rehashing something you runts learned about when you were third years.” And jabbed a sharp thumb behind him.

He paused. Then made some comment about _well actually, that reminds me’a some traveling I did a couple years back-_

But whatever that tangent was, Max was not gonna give it any attention. He was on the floor. And he was chilling. And neither of those were going to change unless something made it.

Something better not make it.

To his right Ed yawned, “Something from third year?” And flicked some earwax off their pinky, “Dudes, my brain doesn’ even lemme remember what shirt I wore last week.” 

The spot they’d claimed was off to the side, smack in the middle of whatever sad excuse of clear sky and sunshine remained: a faint rectangle of light unassisted by sconces flame. Sure the breakfast ceiling predicted rain, and outside wasn’t exactly looking too hot, and Max was still trying to get his goosebumps to chill, but their group sat comfortably-ish in their warm-ish safety parallelogram. 

A small smile tilted at the corner of RJ’s mouth as their hands came up to move. _'Betcha remember what was for dessert Thursday’_ , an exaggerated overemphasis placed on the bump of their fist’s laid down D’s.

Ed gasped in mock offense. They adjusted, head moving off RJ’s lap as their upper body twisted to support itself onto their elbows. A hand came up to place itself on their chest. “Why, I never!” They _hmphed_ , then broke into a smile and poked their partner on the nose. “I’ll have y’know it’s _totally_ reasonable to remember chocolate pudding day.”

There was a rustle of fabric as Max stretched. He shifted, position changing nothing too extreme for lack of wanting to disturb the legs piled ontop his own. His eyes caught Isabel’s as she raised her eyebrow in a silent question: _want me to move?_ Max shook his head: _nah, it’s cool._ She squinted, searching for any undertone of polite lie. After a moment, a curt nod of her head. Isabel settled back, boredly resuming distracting Johnny with a shining wisp of red vapor from her wand, head resting lazily against his shoulder.

Students chatted idly as Professor Garcia went on some tangent about the geographical rarities of certain magical creatures. Something about a species of dragon that thrived in the northern mountains.

“Kappas maybe?” Stephen shrugged from his spot next to RJ, both leaning against Ollie. “I think we covered those in, uh.” He frowned. “Uh… Hm.” 

Ollie opened his mouth to answer, but Stephen waved him off, hand waving wildly. “NOOOnononono I GOT this’un jus, jus gimme-” One of his hands went up to scratch his bun, “jus gimme a-” A beat, then his eyes lit up. “OH! YEAH- yeah we totally learned ‘bout those third year! In spring, after Grindylows.” 

He crossed his arms in pride as he nodded. “I remember cause, cause Dimitri totally chewed me out about it last month- was when we were s’pposed t’be studyin’ for NEWTs but I’d gotten a tip there was a _regular sized squid_ in the Great Lake an’ I kept tryin’ t’convince him that findin it’d make an epic date night _because it totally would_ but he kept laughin' an sayin’ no way- which was crazy cute-, and basically we had to-” 

A hand laid heavy and gentle on his shoulder. Stephen’s head turned up, where Ollie gave him a kind and amused look. There was a pause. And then Stephen’s face went pink.

There was a breezy snort and a couple _tsk-tsk_ ’s as Johnny tore his eyes away from the small red figure eights. He laid a hand over his heart and teased something about _Ah, How Marriage Changes You, Don’t Forget Us Down The Line,_ before barking a sharp laugh when Stephen shoved him.

Some girl in a Durmstrang uniform glanced over as Max flopped onto his back, groaning. “Oh, my god.” An arm slung over his face, “Guys, class? We’re in class? We are in class, please.” 

Johnny aimed a swat back in Stephen’s direction and Ollie threatened to stand up, leaving both with nobody to comfortably lean on. They quieted. 

Max gave another look towards the front of the room. Whatever dragon lecture Garcia’d been going on about seemed about ready to come to a close, and he was _not_ about to get called on and have no answer. 

No... Not a seventh time. 

Weight shifted off his legs, taking body heat with it. Great. One more thing to catch a cold over. Max grimaced. Yeesh, it was freezing. The floor his cheek laid against was practically ice. Sure you could blame it on the weather, and stone held a chill easily, but April was supposed to be nearing spring, not backtracking into nearly winter temperatures. It was uncanny icing on top of already unpleasant fondant covered cake. 

Actually scratch that, there was no cake. You cut into it, and it’s uncanny fondant all the way to the core. Disgusting. And then, to put icing on top of all that? _Uncanny_ icing? What kind of sick monster would do such a thing. Gross. 

God, he hated fondant. What was he just thinking about.

Something pulled at his arm. His face unstuck with a peel. Oh, right. The floor.

Something turned into someone, as Isabel’d grabbed his hand to tug him back into sitting position. She’d stood up- _so that’s where the leg heat had gone-_ leaning over to both get him sitting and pat her skirt free of dust. Max held onto her wrist and let out another groan, head falling back in defiance. She huffed a laugh and hauled him to his feet.

“Hey Champ,” She whispered, “I think Garcia’s gonna quit the Dragon Chat any sec now.” Her attention flicked to the front of the room. “We might actually get to the part where he tells us what we’re doing. You know, before we’re all dead.” She looked back, eyes lit with mischief, and winked.

Thoughts of Freak Fondant abandoned, Max groaned in response. “I think you’re giving him too much credit. Remember when he kept us an extra half hour talking about lycanthropy? I thought Zarei was gonna give us like, a month’s worth of detention.”

Garcia made some dramatic motion that was either jaws clamping shut or ravenous consumption of a sandwich. Max wasn’t sure which was more in character.

He sighed, “If it hadn’t been the whole class we would’ve been done for. Would’nt’ve even stood a chance.”

Isabel gave a vague noncommittal noise that was either _yes unfortunately I remember it vividly and it blew massive chunks_ or _sorry Puckett that one’s been repressed due to its negative connotations_. Max wasn’t sure which was more in character.

She rolled on the balls of her feet, coming down only to bounce up again. “Mm, I guess. Something tells me this one’s gonna be grodier than the wolfperson lesson though.” Isabel blew some hair from her face. “I mean, if we ever get to it.”

A sharp- 

**_SNAP_ **

-reverberated off cold stone walls as the skin of Garcia’s hands came down in a deafening slap. Students winced either in response to the sudden noise or the grotesqueness of the story he was recalling. Whatever encounter he’d had with a dragon, he was great at retelling it. And by _great_ Max meant _horrifying_ meant _assumed it was horrifying_. 

It darkened. Overhead, the window which they stood had cracked ajar, teased open by steadily repetitive gusts of outside’s brewing rainfall. An offshoot of said gusts made its curious leisure through the gap and washed through the area. Sconces on the wall flickered in the afterwave, their light poured slow and fragile from dim wicks. Any comfort added by their appearance was just that: appearance. A placebo in the face of creeping discomfort. Their safety parallelogram betrayed.

He shivered. Again.

“Yeah, hey, are the vibes off to anyone? Or am I losing it.” 

Isabel and Ollie shared a concerned look. 

“Oh super off, shortstack.” Stephen leaned an elbow on Max’s head. “A-hyep!” he cracked his neck and gave the sky a good stare. “I’d probably put this’un at a Code _3-M Blue Delta_ .”  
  
“I’m not going to- _GET your arm OFF I swear_ \- I’m not going to ask what that is.”

“ _Ministry mind control_ . Real subliminal. Uses a whole buncha suggestive thinking- I been readin’ some theories. Y’know if ya can control the mood ya control the populace?” He nodded, deathly serious, and made a face at the window. “That’s why I don’t believe in weather.”  
  
“I hate you?”  
  
“Guys,” Isabel shooed Stephen away, “we can keep this going at lunch but right now I’ve gotta agree with Max.” She cast an uneasy glance over her shoulder. “I can’t place it, but something feels off.”

Stephen’s face poked out from where he hid behind Ollie and stuck his tongue out. Max made a gesture he was glad Zoey wasn’t there to see.

“Teach said third year, yeah?” Garcia made some grand motion at the wooden fixture in front of the stairs. Johnny scratched the back of his head, digging into his pocket and grabbing a small bottle. He took a swig and frowned. “Yeah I’m with Ed on that one, hell if I remember jack from three years ago.”  
  
“Maybe not three but howabout four-” Stephen snickered and Johnny made a lunge for him. 

They circled Ollie’s exhausted, increasingly less patient form like irresponsible hyperactive children. His eye twitched, and Max watched Isabel’s face bunch up to keep from laughing as both were grabbed by the scruff of their robes. Ollie held them in the air a moment before dropping both. RJ’s phone camera flashed.

“It’s kinda deja-vuy.” Ed frowned, “Creepin’ me out. Bad jubies.”

It sat: ominous, looming, not to mention huge. How’d Garcia manage to get this thing through the door anyway? Size aside, it looked _crazy_ old. Clear glossy finish had likely once laid over the strong yet withered mahogany. But that must have been ages ago, and the thing didn’t seem to be in nearly as good condition. Wood was cracked and dusty. Hinges creaked. Handles were worn down. It seemed like something out of a-

Wait, _‘bad jubies’_? Why’d that sound like something he’d heard before?

That he’d heard Ed say before?

Something scratched and nagged and tried to make its way to the front of Max’s head. 

Garcia’s dragon overtime seemed to be finishing up- for actual this time. “-So that’s why I always travel with two spare can openers. Now that I’ve graced you with a fascinating anecdote from my glamorous personal life, it’s time to be moving on to our main subject.” 

He folded his arms over his chest, wand poking out of the crook of his elbow. “Like I said: a bunch of magical creatures are regional. Our visitors from Durmstrang probably wouldn’t have an encounter with a Demiguise, and our Beauxbatons students likely would never have the delight of meeting a Blast-Ended Skrewt. Disappointingly, not all creatures have limited geographical habitats. Such as our lesson today, most can be found wherever.” There was a new chill to the air as he gave the large wardrobe another apprehensive stink eye. “If you know where to look.” 

...And they were looking. At some storage? A closet? Narnia. Were they going to Narnia? Max frowned, no, they would’ve had to sign field trip forms. 

Still though, what about the creepy box was so special?

Yeah it gave off some freaky vibes, and he didn’t really want to get close if he could avoid it, and it felt like something was pouring ice down his shirt, and-

Wait,

Garcia took a sidestep away from it almost subconsciously, as though he was unnerved and didn’t even realize. As if the chest’s simple act of existing filled him up with cold dread. With a slow paralysis that rooted you to the ground so you couldn’t run. With terror. With-

Max’s eyes widened. “No.”  
  
-with fear.

“No way.” He deadpanned. “Not a chance. No. Absolutely not. Oh my god.” 

“That’s right, Puckett!” Garcia shouted. He’d worked up the nerve to give the thing a hearty slap, “You heard me at the start of class: We’re doin’ _this_ again.” An action he instantly seemed to regret. He shuddered, wiping the hand on his slacks. “Alright y’impressionable youths! Get yourselves ready for _Boggarts 2.0: they’re back an’ this time it’s personal_.”

Oh hell no. Not again. It- they were supposed to do it once. The learning experience was over, they can move on to new things, they could learn something cooler, something that didn’t involve acromantulas, something that didn’t make him scream enough for the class next door to hear, so that then people from the class next door come over to check and make sure everythings cool, and it was super embarrassing, and-

Max turned to Isabel and stared firm with glazed eyes. “Jinx me.”

She patted him gently on the shoulder. “No.”

Johnny perked, “I’ll do it-” Isabel shoved a hand into his cheek, and he shut up.

“Isabel,” Max pleaded “ok listen- if I’m unconscious then Garcia can’t make me go up and you can take me to the infirmary so we’ll both get out early and also I don’t have _Heart Attack 2.0: Freak Demon’s Back And This Time It’s Personal_ and it’ll be great. I think that sounds super. Doesn’t that sound super, Isabel?”  
  
“No?”  
  
“I think I speak for us both when I say it sounds Really Fucking Super.”

“I’m not jinxing you!” She shoved Johnny off her hand and stuck a finger in Maxes face, cheeks puffed out. “I mean, not for this anyway. If you wanna mess around outside class and let me test dueling spells that’s different, talk to me then.”

“I don’t want to do tha-”  
  
Isabel gave his nose a flick, “But!” Her face lit up. She turned her head to the wardrobe, grin growing. When she looked back, nothing about the way her eyes shone read mischief anymore. Her glow was pure adrenaline. “This is a rematch I’ve been waiting for. There’s no way I’m just walking out!” She grabbed him gentle but firm and steered them both back towards the front.

Max’s shoulders sagged. He kissed his last fleeting hope of Not Doing This Again goodbye, and joined the others in painfully paying attention to whatever was going on at the front of class.

“Now those of you who were here last time might remember certain,” Garcia’s face soured, “... _cephalopod..._ related... events,” A Beauxbatons student gave their friend a confused look. Helpful Hogwarts Friend opened their mouth to explain, and was cut off by a loud “THAT DON’T GOTTA BE REPEATED HERE AND NOW,” as their professor gave the _‘or else detention’_ stare.

Both students shut up instantly.

Garcia sent a longing look at his desk chair. Pinched the bridge of his nose. Then sighed and loosened his tie.

“But,” he said wearily, “the stakes aren’t as low this time.” 

He took the hand away from his face, tired eyes turned hard. They swept over students, making steady and firm eye contact. Max bristled.

“Next year, you all’re taking your NEWTs. And these nasty creeps-” Garcia jabbed with his chin, “are part of the practical exam. I set you up against one way back, but the one you’re gonna meet in the test’ll be a hell of a lot nastier. So!” He leaned backwards, several satisfying _pops_ coming from his back. “This bein’ your NEWT-level DAtDA class, I’m givin’ you a rehash.”

“Isabel I don’t want a rehash.”  
  
She raised a finger and shushed.

“The one you’re going up against today is about the same strength as the one you’ll face on the practical.” Garcia continued. “It’s a nasty piece of work, so I want to warn you.” A chilled breeze drifted through the open window, blowing through the heavy fabric of their professor's robe and mussing up his hair. Garcia didn’t seem bothered, just remained focused. His stare kept eerily serious.

“Isabel I _really_ don’t want a rehash,”

She repeated the motion, but gave his wrist a soft comforting squeeze.

Garcia sighed, expression softening slightly. “I’m not gonna let it hurt anyone.” Then he looked away and coughed into his fist. “But just know that this thing isn’t gonna be easy. This Boggart is _not_ for training, is _not_ for messing around with, and _not_ for taking lightly. It’s gonna show you stuff, and won’t hold back.”

He shrugged. “So like don’t die, or whatever.”

Ed fidgeted. “I don’t think that’s as comfortin’ as he wanted it to be.”

There was a quiet hum as Isabel seemed to mull the situation over. 

“I guess not,” She said slowly, “But we did these things once and were fine. Who says we can’t do it again?” 

Max gave a gentle tug away and her hand let go. “Yeah,” He rubbed at his temples, “but if I have to relive the terror of stumbling into that acromantula nest first year I’m gonna go bananas. Is it worth the bananas, Isabel? I don’t think it’s worth the bananas.”

Her face held an amused grin and an eye roll. “Yeah, yeah, dork.” Max stuck his tongue out and she laughed. “It’s not a big deal! Look ok, here’s how it’ll go: I make that dumb thing go crying home to its weirdo box, and then I make a smoothie out of your bananas. It’s delicious and tastes like victory and it’s great and everyone’s happy.” 

The smile she wore went gentler and she tugged on his and Eds robe sleeves. “Sound like a deal?”

Max held back as long as he could, but he couldn’t help it. The Please I’m Your Best Friend eyes were too strong. He gave a probably too dramatic sigh and nodded, Ed following suit. Isabel's smile lit up again, and they tuned back into the lecture.

“But luckily on my end, this time I won’t be doing all the heavy work. Today we’re getting some extra help from my seventh year teaching assistant,” he jabbed a thumb behind him, “Mr. Isaac O’Connor.”

Whatever pleased little look of proud self-satisfaction Isaac had worn when he first stepped forward at Garcia’s announcement was promptly squashed by Isabel's _HEY PROFESSOR WHY’D YOU ANNOUNCE HIM LIKE ITS OUR FIRST TIME MEETING WHEN IT’S APRIL_ shouted across the room. Instantly his face went up in red, several low snickers skirting between classmates.

If Max was one of them, that was between him and nobody.

Isaac shot a grumpy, venom filled scowl their way as he stepped forward. He took a deep breath in through the nose. Exhaled. And propped his foot up on a chair Max couldn’t recall being there two seconds earlier. He flashed the class a smile, propping his chin against his fist and- OHgodWHAT- WHY was- _how’d_ he- _JESUS_ that was bright-

“Oh no, not _again_ .” Isabel sighed, a hand over her eyes. “Dude learned glitter charms his third year and _never_ forgot it.” She groaned. Max just squinted and tried to regain feeling in his corneas.

“Hello younger classmates of whom I have been gifted the delight of assist-instructing this fine fine afternoon,” Somewhere to Max’s left Johnny _boooooo_ -ed and Isaac’s blinding facade flickered. He cleared his throat and spoke louder, voice strained. “INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO SO-CALLED FRIENDS IN THE CROWD-” 

“We can’t see nothin, O’Connor! Y’gotta dim your face!”

“Johnny could’ve phrased that better but yes please turn it down Isaac thanks a ton!!”

There was a loud groan, and the anime sparkle level dulled significantly. Max blinked spots from his vision. Once- nope, still blind. Twice- better, but he was pretty sure Ed had a head on their shoulders and not just a shifting dark mass. Three times- ok, yeah, that worked. Cool. He squeezed them shut one more time for good measure, and when he could see again Isaac had gone from ‘ _Seven Magical Girl Transformations At Once’_ to ‘ _Spender During The Holiday Season’_. 

So like, still an eyesore, but one Max was used to.

Isaac’s shoulders had slumped in grumpy annoyance. His attempt at looking cool had backfired, and he dejectedly removed his propped up leg. Isabel shot him an encouraging thumbs up. He sighed heavily, abandoning his original glamor and cutting the shimmer completely. He shoved the chair away with his foot and propped both hands up on his hips. 

“Okay,” He tried again, “I’m leading the exercise this afternoon for those who it wasn’t obvious to, so,” Isaac pinched the bridge of his nose and inhaled deeply, exhale coming out in a strangled and defeated groan. “So just- just pay attention, okay? Eyes on me.”

He shooed the students at the front back several feet, something about ‘blast zone’ or whatever. 

As if it felt the approach, the wardrobe seemed to have life breathed into it. With each step Isaac took to close the gap between himself and the thing the lights dimmed, the air got a smidge chillier, the wood of the box creaked louder with eager hunger. 

Isaac looked over his shoulder and made a face that he probably wanted to look cool but absolutely failed from that angle, “Watch…” He chuckled in a way that he also probably wanted to sound cool but absolutely failed at that angle, “...and learn.”

And with a flourish of his robe, which would have been much more successful if the fabric didn’t get caught in the wind and blown it back in his face, Isaac flicked his wand and freed the lock.

Ed, Isabel and Max shared a nervous side eye. Isaac hadn’t been in their class when they faced boggarts the first time, so this was uncharted territory. And this one was supposed to be bad, what would that mean for him? Sure the guy could be a douche sometimes, but he was their friend. Nobody wanted to see him get thrashed in front of the whole class.

The door creaked open, and all three held their breath. 

Isaac gulped, trying to keep his face brave. 

A sandal stepped out. One of them? Max knew- they _all_ knew- that he’d had issues with trust and acceptance when they were younger. But there was no way, right? That was forever ago. Like. Years. 

A hand pushed the door away, and a figure left the confines of the dark wood. It stepped into visibility, and-

……….And Max had absolutely no idea who or what he was looking at.

It was a kid, about their age, with shaggy black hair half tied back. He had some stupid looking purple rope keeping what was? A blanket? Tied around his waist, and Max had never seen this guy before in his life.

Apparently, however, Isaac had. He gasped, dramatically taking a step back and an arm coming up defensively. “N-no……! You shouldn’t be- why are _you_ here…?”

Weird outfit kid turned up his nose in a disgusted look, “Why am I here?” He spat, “Because you disappoint me. So I’m here to tell you…” He turned his back to Isaac, and theatrically threw his head over his shoulder to glare. “That I’m done.”

Isaac’s eyes went wide with shock and heartbreak. 

“It's over.” The boy lamented, “I’m leaving you.”  
  
Tears welled in Isaacs eyes as he gasped, hand coming up to his mouth. “N-no!! Sasuke- please! We can work this out!”  
  
A cruel smirk curled at the edge of the black haired boy’s lips. “Heh… Sorry, Isaac.” He sneered. “But I don’t believe it.”

Isaac stepped forward, the gap between the two staying the same as whatever Isaac said his name was took a step back. Max pinched his arm. Nope, not hallucinating.

“But...” Isaac held his arms out. “Why? What have I done… To make you stop loving me…?”

Max leaned over, face blank. “What in the fresh hell is happening.”

“I…” Isabel's throat was dry. “I don’t. I don’t know.”

Ropeboy McWeirdohair spat at Isaacs shoes. “Your characterization of me- of _us-_ in your _Parks And Recreation Domestic AU_ was disgusting and inaccurate. I’m leaving you… for Sakura.”  
  
Instantly, Isaacs eyes flashed. He regained his composure, breathing deeply and punctuating his exhale by whipping an arm out to point at the figure. “You- I know now! You can’t hurt me, everyone who’s not a complete DEGENERATE-” Max blinked, “-knows if you were to leave me for anyone it’d be Naruto! You’re a _fake!_ ” 

There was a horrified gasp as a long strip of wood was whipped out of Isaacs pocket. He looked the anime boy in the eye and struck a pose. The wand pointed itself dead ahead as Isaac shouted: _“Riddikulus!”_

**_SNAP_ **

A loud hissing noise filled the air as whateverhisnamewas’s horrified face was clouded over by blue fog. A gust of air swept across the floor, and when the mist cleared all that was left of poor anime jerk was a Funko Pop figurine. 

Above it, Isaac stood triumphant. His arms crossed over his chest, wand resheathed in his pants pocket. He leaned down, laughing directly in the plastic face of the toy. It wobbled, the sound berating its very being as it flew back into the safe confines of the dark cabinet. The doors slammed shut and the lock clicked closed. 

Isaac placed his hands confidently on his hips and turned to face the class, all of which were staring wide eyed and open mouthed. He grinned humbly, eyes closing and hands coming up to wave gently in the air.

“Ahaha... that technique? I’m sure you were all following quite closely and noticed the arm movement… It’s all in the wrist, you see,” He kept going but Max had 100% tuned out.

Somewhere behind him, Johnny whispered something to RJ like _yo dude you got that on camera right?_ and Max was pretty sure they nodded.

Isaacs face turned and he flashed the class a smile. “Impressive, no?”

“NO”  
  
“I DID NOT ASK YOU STEVENS.”

He shot his glare across the room to their group. Isaac steamed a moment, then seemed to chill himself down. He waved a hand in the air and cleared his throat, “Okay! Demonstration done, start sorting yourselves into an ordered line and we’ll get started in a couple minutes.”

With another unsuccessful flair of his robe, Isaac exited center stage. He went to his original post at the side of the room and- turned left. And started walking through the crowd and oh god he was coming their way.

“Oh hell no,” Stephen paled, “I am SO not gettin’ busted by that guy again! I’ll see you punks later- m’gonna go stand with Dimitri over at the back.” He gave a glance at the clouds outside and clicked his tongue disapprovingly, “Yep, jus’ like I suspected. Weather mood control. That must be why the guy’s pissed.” He gave their group a sharp grin before sticking his tongue out and dashing into the mob of students.

“Bro m’pretty sure it was the hecklin that gotcha on his bad list not the wea- an’ he’s gone.” Ollie sighed. He turned, scratching at his chin with his wand. “Prolly better go make sure he doesn’t start nothin. Anyone wanna come with?”

RJ raised an eyebrow at Ed. The two glanced back at the remaining three. Shared a look with Ollie, who seemed to understand something Max was catching onto. Then shrugged. “We’re in.” Ed answered, grinning.

Ollie glanced back in a silent question.

“Pass.” Isabel shook her head with a polite smile. She looked up, both fists pumping up with excitement. “I wanna get this thing soon as I can! Thanks though, have fun!”

“Uh,” Johnny coughed into his fist. “Yeah. I’ll catch up with y’jerks once m’done, cool?” He looked at something, then away just as quickly. “Wanna, uh. Get it real good. For totally.” He looked back and was met with Ollie’s unconvinced face. He raised a torturously slow eyebrow and Johnny’s face went pink. 

They seemed to have some weird psychic back and forth that Max could not decipher for the life of him, and when he snuck a glance at Isabel she shrugged in equal confusion. She made a face like: _What???_ And Max made a face back like: _I dunno!!!!!!!_

Which wasn’t a lie. But saying he didn’t have a suspicion would be.

Eventually both parties snapped out of their telekinetic communication at the same time. Johnny grit his teeth and glared murder at his homeboy, who seemed like he was trying not to crack up.

Ollie grinned and looked at Max, but the question was different. That wasn’t said out loud, but it didn’t need to be. He spent a moment considering, but shook his head. “As much as I’d adore sneaking off and avoiding getting my bones creeped out of me,” Max shrugged, “I better keep an eye on. Things.” They shared a look, “Over here. Enjoy your maniac wrangling.”

He got a giant thumbs up in response, shared with a poor attempt at an inconspicuous shrug. “Suit’chur self. Enjoy the show.” Ollie turned, glint in his eye vanishing as his height gave him vision of something they couldn't see. “Steph!” He shouted, running into the crowd. “Man I'm tellin ya, quit tryna hex the sky-!”

RJ saluted, grabbing Ed by the wrist and following suit. They both disappeared, and Max was left with entertainment for the remainder of the period. Oops! Sorry, not entertainment, his two very good friends Isabel and Jo-  
  
“So……… Pretty impressive, huh? Heh.” 

Oh right and Isaac was coming over he forgot.

He glanced around the area, scanning the students for a familiar face. “Sooo, was that Stevens kid over here? Pretty sure I heard him over here.”  
  
Johnny’d calmed his face down and blinked, face expressionless. “What’s a Steven.”

To Max’s right, Isabel brought a hand to her face and laughed quietly. Isaac’s eyebrows drew themself together and squinted. He looked over the sea of heads and sighed in defeat. “One of these days. One of these days I’ll get him.”

Isabel brought her hand down, smile still goofy as she put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “Is this vendetta still about the hair incident? He apologized for that, you know.”  
  
“He set it on FIRE, ISABEL.”  
  
“It went out! He said he was sorry.”  
  
“THAT’S NOT THE _POINT, ISABEL._ ”

She waved her free hand. “It was three seconds, and you’re not bald.” Isaac went to say something, “But hey!” Isabel said, grin bright and excited. “That was really good form up there!” and he paused.  
  
“Wait, really?” Isaacs face dusted pink.

The smile Isabel wore was warm and enthusiastic, filled with genuine care and pride for a friend. “Yeah, doofus!” She brought a hand down, curling it to gently slug him in the shoulder. “I mean, I had absolutely no idea what was going on at like any point in time at all whatsoever,” And she looked away at that, “but the wand movement looked perfect from where we’re standing. You’ve had trouble with _Riddikulus_ since your OWLs, but that was great! Have you been practicing?”

Isaac stared wide eyed and wordless. Then quirked up a smile. “I- yeah actually! I have!”

Max caught Johnny’s eye and snorted as he made a gagging motion.

The noise interrupted and brought the attention away from whatever exciting discussion Isabel and Isaac were having about Proper Wrist Form and How To Brace Yourself Properly and whatever. Isaac was still smiling, but raised a suspicious eyebrow. “What?”

“Oh, nothing. Gotta side with Isabel though, you did a good job.” Max shoved his hands into his pockets, “Or whatever.” 

The praise took its time sinking in, and Isaac puffed out his chest with pride. “Well I mean, if you insist then truly who am I to deny the words of a _true believer-_ ”  
  
“Yeah okay moment ruined stop I take it back.” Max hid his smile. Then frowned. “Actually- I know I’m gonna regret asking this but- what was up with your freaking boggart, dude. That’s not what I was expecting at all.”

There was a hum and a quiet cough and a murmur and a nod of agreement. 

The look of suspicion grew as Isaac’s eyes narrowed. “And what _were_ you expecting?”

Oh, jeez. Okay, can’t backpedal you’re in too deep. Max shrugged, “I dunno I just thought it’d be like. Spender calling you lame or something.”

A hand came up to offendedly rest on Isaac’s chest as he scoffed. “Um? Maybe if I was an insecure overly emotional loser with an overdependence on adult figures and no spine.”  
  
Max opened his mouth.

Max closed his mouth.  
  
That same moment Garcia called out for any volunteers before the lineup began. He gave Isaac a stern look as if to say _get it in gear kid, we’re burning daylight_. Isaac’s face went an embarrassed red and he signaled back a thumbs up. Max took a look at the students around him. He’d known most of them forever. Uh, not like that meant he knew their names, but he recognized faces from the last time they’d done this dumb lesson. Would any of them volunteer? Who’d even want to? You’d have to be either stupid out of your mind or trying to impress somebody.

“Damn.” Johnny had his arms folded and stared at the wardrobe hard. He glanced to Maxs right, then away just as quick. “Yeah I could prolly take like four-a these punk ass trick-or-treat creepazoids at once.” He nodded very seriously. “Yep. I could see it.”

Okay, that answered that question.

“Dude.” Max squinted. “I know you’re good at offensive spells and stuff but. How did you get into this class.”

He was met by the raise of Johnny’s eyebrows. “Uh, the door? Same as you, duh.”  
  
Wind swept up the bottom of his robe as Max spun on his heel to make direct deadpan eye contact with Isabel. She pointedly avoided it.

“Anyway,” He gave her one last persistent stare _(which she also blatantly ignored)_ and faced back to normal. “Still no idea what the freak kind of crypt freaker is that edgy kid from Boruto.”

Isaac gasped, horror overcoming his face. “ _Max!_ ” He hissed, “That- it’s not-! Sasuke isn’t from _Boruto!_ Boruto’s the sequel about the son and his second generation friends!”

Max blinked. “Oh. Uh. The edgy kid from… Boruto’s dad…?”  
  
If you looked into the eyes of Isaac O’Connor at that exact moment you would find no trace of human soul. They were devoid of life, of compassion and of warmth. Of sympathy, of second chances, of genuine care for fellow human beings. In that moment the only thing Max could see was void. And maybe if he started running now he could jump in the lake before Isaac got to him.

But the hard stare he wore broke, and Max was instead met with pleasant surprise. An easy smile grew on Isaac’s face. He turned, “Professor Garcia!” He shouted, and as his head turned back to their group. Except that- oh god. No. 

“Isaac,” 

While the seemingly warm smile was enough to deceive upon first glance, a second look showed the eyes. They’d put on a mask. But their true nature could be seen just below the surface. “I’ve got our first volunteer over here!” He slung an arm around Max’s shoulders in a death grip.

“ISAAC,”

“That’s right! Max Puckett! Our own superstar champion has willingly stepped forward to begin today's exercise!” He steered them both forward and away from the concern and mild amusement of his two other friends. Max squirmed but the faux-friendly vice around his shoulders was surprisingly steadfast despite it’s owners otherwise lanky frame devoid of any muscle mass whatsoever.

By the time Max’s shoulders were unhindered by the strength of a kid who never went outside they’d gotten through the hoard of students and to the head of the room. Garcia looked up with disinterest. “Ah, Puckett.” Their professor had a momentary pause while taking in the scene before him. Then shrugged. “Thank you for starting us off. Whenever you're ready.”

Isaac stared blankly as he let go, a quiet _I’ll see you in hell_ whispered into Max’s ear. Max swatted him the rest of the way off and came very close to vocalizing some very frowned upon jinxes right there in front of everyone.

He scanned the line for the two he’d left behind. They had to be somewhere, they wouldn’t just run. Scratch that- they probably wouldn’t. At least, Isabel wouldn’t.

Up here in front of the class everything felt so… Empty. So bare. When he looked at the crowd of students they seemed so far away- his classmates just watching, his friends unreachable. He was just. Alone.

 _God_ it gave him the heebie jeebies. He’d just gotten over the way it felt three years ago, only to get dumped back in the hot seat. _‘Hey dude, I know you had that nasty encounter in the woods when you were eleven and fell into the nest of a giant freaking spider and her hundreds of hairy babies. Y’know what’d make you feel better? Reliving it. Maybe even twice.'_ Yeah sounds piss poor thanks internal monologue. 

Off to the side Garcia cleared his throat. Max prayed one last threat to whatever unholy being was up there and gave him the nod to unlock the door. His professor flicked his wand, and the bolt creaked undone.

If he so much as saw a strand of web he was gonna lose his mind. 

“Max!!”

He perked, head spinning over his shoulder to check the noise. It was. Oh what the fresh hell-

Isabel’d somehow scrambled her way onto the top of her quidditch partners shoulders. Aforementioned quidditch partner seemed to be doing everything he could to try and remove his Captain without actually letting her fall. She waved her arms to get his attention- as if the spectacle itself wasn't enough. 

Something inside him softened. They must’ve seen him trying to find them in the mob. So what, their first instinct was to look ridiculous in front of everyone?  
  
She must’ve seen the bewildered look on his face and recognized it as the fact he’d noticed their stunt. At the new height Isabel caught a stray sunbeam and glowed, reflected by gold and red. Her waving doubled in enthusiasm and Johnny had to physically grab her arm in order to keep their hastily slapped together stack from tipping over. 

Wherever they were, Max prayed that RJ had their camera out.

After the realization of _Height Plus Movement Equals Wiping Out On Stone Floor_ , Isabel settled for giving him two thumbs up and what was probably going to be a _‘you can do this!!!’_ , but despite best efforts wobbled at the last second. Both Gryffindor beaters yelped in tandem at what Max could only assume to be Johnny losing his footing, and toppled out of sight.

Max was so stunned he barely registered the click of the wardrobe handle opening.

A couple seconds passed. A couple more. He couldn’t pay attention forever, he had to make sure the stupid monster masher didn’t get the jump on him and- oh wait. Wait hold on. A single thumbs up lifted up above the heads and from the depths he swore he heard Isabel’s voice go _we’re okay kick it’s butt dude!!!_

God. They were such dweebs. 

And it helped. He turned, readily facing the doors as one slowly swung open. It was okay. He could do this. Isabel went the extra mile to make sure to assure him he could do this. And Johnny? Well. Ok Johnny probably was that mile.

Worst fear? As if- Max was gonna make sure by the end of this he was _its_ worst fear. Just remember the spell.

He could do this.

Max tensed, wand gripped firmly as he waited. A leg gingerly stepped out of the cabinet. His eyes widened in horror as a figure emerged.

“Hi my names Max Puckett I’m a boy and I’m in a romantic relationship with Isaac O’Conno-“

The apparition never got to finish its sentence before Max let out a shrill scream, all thoughts of wizardry fleeing his mind as he ran forward, punting the being back into the dresser through pure leg force alone.

Professor Garcia stood across the room, face a look of complete confusion and dismay. His eyes went from Max’s panting figure, arms resting on his knees as he wheezed, then slowly back to the cupboard which now once again... contained its bogeyman. 

Silence washed over the classroom, Maxes strained hacking coughs the only sound as the surrounding sixth years stood dumbfounded. Cody shifted on his feet. Isabel and Johnny _(now properly upright)_ shared a look. Somewhere cross the room, Ed sneezed. 

“You just..” Garcia spoke, “You just. Kicked it.” He frowned, mouth still slightly agape. “You kicked my Boggart.”

Max was on the floor now, breaths strained as both Gryffindor beaters pushed through the crowd to help him up, Isabel patting his arm gently as they got him to his feet.

“Never,” Max wheezed, “let me do that again.”

And just like that, the classroom air was filled with easy laughter. One Beauxbatons student leaned on a Ravenclaw, the pair chuckling good naturedly. A group of Hufflepuff girls huffed over the very _idea_ of their favorite Champion being anyone other than himself. Dimitri leaned back against a pillar and off handedly commented if Stephen thought this would be considered another task, to which Stephen easily replied _no, no, y’gotta think bigger than that, Danger. work with me here: Werewolves_.

Garcia cleared his throat loudly, catching the attention of the class once more. “Alright, _alright_. Shut it you little runts, we’ve still got half a class to get through.” He turned, running a hand through his hair and muttering something about _goddamn kids who do they think they-_ and _MY freakin boggart-_ and _what kinda wizard thinks they can just kick a fear demon-_ and _why didn't_ **_I_ ** _think about kickin the fear demon-_

Max didn’t have the emotional energy for continuing to pay attention to his Professors backhanded grumblings and allowed himself to be dragged across the room. 

“You know.” Isabel didn’t try to hide her smile, “When I said to kick its butt, I didn’t mean literally. You doin' okay?”

They passed his assistant on their way, and offended didn’t even _begin_ to describe the look on Isaac’s face. His jaw hung wide, scoff sounded loud and clear. And loud. He turned to the approaching trio with a hand to his chest. “I- HEY! How’s DATING ME your WORST FEAR? OUT OF EVERYTHING ON THIS EARTH?”

Max didn’t have the emotional energy for this either but the universe didn’t seem to be giving him much leeway. 

Isaac huffed, tapping his foot impatiently. “Well???”

He blinked, squinting in baffled confusion. “I- oh my god,” Max used the arm held up by Johnny to pinch at his eyebrows, before expelling it in a stupor. “Cause I’m a DYKE you huge whiny idiot- why do you even CARE that dating you isn't number one on my list of wishes upon stars! You-” This was gonna leave a migraine, “you’re gay! We’re BOTH gay! I have no attraction!”

Isaac gave a _psh_ , arms folded as he waved a hand in disinterest. “Um? Yeah but you have eyes.”

Max’s eye twitched. “Yes I also have hands, that are very capable of throttling you with.”

“Oh-kay!” Isabel gave the top of his head a pat and shifted her grab under his armpit. “That’s enough of that, c’mon. And you!” She turned to Isaac, who’d grouched tenfold. “No sexuality drama two seconds after trauma monsters!”

Isaac opened his mouth. “Wh! But-!”  
  
“No!”  
  
“BUT-”

“No!!!”

He whined and grumbled some comment about Sasuke never treating him this way. Isabel gave him a good natured hair ruffle and he huffed.

Johnny grabbed his plastic bottle as the trio got far enough away, offering it to Max with a quirked eyebrow. “Puckett, you good? Cause like, I didn’t know those things were touchable before, but now I do, an’ I can definitely clobber it. If you want. Seriously. I’m kinda itchin to.”

It got a swat on the shoulder from Isabel, and then almost immediately after a moment of thought an enthusiastic nod. “Actually, yeah.” she agreed “We’ll totally punch that thing if need be. Ten thousand percent easy. Say the word.”

Max accepted the water gratefully, giving a noncommittal hand gesture and shrug as he leaned back to waterfall. The classroom buzzed gently as they stood, Max catching some Beauxbatons kid turned a werewolf into a bad rendition of 80’s movie costume makeup. Clever. 

_But still unsettling,_ he thought with a shiver. He screwed the bottle shut, handing it back.

All 3 jumped as a _BANG_ set off across the classroom, a swarm of cornish pixies exploding to fireworks. As the ceiling lit up in a cacophony of colors the Ravenclaw responsible took a deep bow, flashing some of the Beauxbatons girls a self assured grin and a blown kiss. 

The trio groaned in tandem annoyance. _Ugh, Palmer._

Said Ravenclaw caught their group's eye as they stared, grin widening as he shot Isabel a wink. Isabel, who promptly gave him a thumbs down, loudly mouthing _‘No.’_ She pivoted on her heel, immediately turning her back to the crowd and pointing a finger down her throat in a gagging motion to the other two.

Max snorted, tension gone as the air warmed next to him.  
  
Johnny glared across the room. “Knowitall creep better watch his winks b’fore I get his ass with a bludger.” He grumbled.  
  
“Before _we_ get his ass with a bludger.” Isabel corrected. “Next game Ravenclaw won’t know what hit ‘em.” She paused, giving the student who’d instantly begun flirting with a Slytherin boy another glance. “Well I mean. Yes they will, it’ll be bludgers. That we hit at them. And their dumb Captain who can’t take a hint.”

He started grumbling about some _'cocky jerk sonnova-’_ and _‘gonna friggin stick his face inna-’_ and _‘jinx his fancy freakin hair purple-’_ and promptly paused, breathing deeply and exhaling through the nose. His eyebrows still knit together, but all bite had gone. Johnny _hmph_ ed as he took a long swig from his water bottle. 

When Max looked to try and figure out if it really _was_ steam that had left with the exhale _(or if he was imagining things? was that water boiling before? lol dude)_ , he very decidedly chose _not_ to notice the hand attached to the arm attached to the _Isabel_ that had given Johnny's wrist a squeeze.

But their gazes returned as Cody had stepped up, the shadow cast by the looming wardrobe enveloping him fully. Max frowned. What the heck would _Cody_ be afraid of? He’d known the guy for nearly six years now and swore he’d never seen him spooked. 

He looked nervous- naturally, considering the exercise.

Max leaned over, voice low. “Any guesses?”

Isabel’s bun caught the light as she turned, eyebrows arched. “Huh? Why’re you asking me?”

They watched, eyes trained on the wardrobe. Nothing seemed changed much- that was weird. Maybe it just needed a minute? Did these things need to recharge? 

Max shrugged as he glanced up at her. “Dunno, not like we’ve known him through adolescence or anything.” He blatantly ignored the smarmy retort Isabel looked about to reply, “But! But. Cody’s the Hufflepuff Captain, right? Don’t you guys have to do, like…” His attention turned back down and his hands came up to motion, “..Captain-y stuff together? Inter-house meetings? Super Secret Broom BFF Bonding? Broom Friend Forever. You share a fancy bathroom?”

She bumped his shoulder with her own, suppressing a smile. “Okay, okay! I get it!” A flyaway freed itself as she shook her head. “And no- Well, I mean yes- _Well,_ ” Isabel blew it out of her face, “Cody only became Captain this year cause Perkins graduated, so he’s technically still new. I mean I’m also technically still new.” Her face scrunched “But I have a year more experience than he does! And we _do_ have bi-monthly meetings- but Coach Oop and the other captains’re there too, it’s not exactly _one-on-one bonding time extraordinaire._ ”

Cody’s face had changed. His eyes widened, and he stared straight ahead. The doors seemed to bulge slightly, but other than that Max didn’t see any changes. 

Of course, standing behind taller students didn’t help. He strained to see over several shoulders. “Sure, sure. I get it, Captain Cult Confidentiality. Though I must acknowledge your lack of mentioning the fancy bathroom.”

Isabel visibly sagged. “ _Please.”_ She groaned, “I don’t care how cool the sinks are, it is _not_ worth overhearing Isaac and Palmer giving each other hair styling tips at 7 in the morning.” Her gaze drifted to the side, and Max followed it to where the two Ravenclaws stood in active conversation near the door. “I avoid it.” She grumbled, “Give me the tower’s shower any day, it’s all water to me.” Her breath huffed as she looked away. “If the place is s'posed to be bribery for _Prefects-And-Captains-To-Be_ it’s not worth it.” 

A few kids at the front were yelping about something- but Max couldn’t figure out what. An unpleasant groan hummed low as the wood strained against something behind its doors.

It didn’t seem like Isabel was having any luck seeing either, but she stood on her toes trying to get a peek anyway. “Actually,” Her attention stayed on the wardrobe, “Didn’t Ollie get nominated for Prefect in the fall?” She looked away only to send a questioning glance at Johnny, who grunted.

“Hey!” He’d put a hand to his chest as if she’d disrespected that ratty jacket he never took off, “Ollie turned ‘em down cause he aint no stinkin _hall monitor_ , alright.” His arms crossed in a huff. Johnny glanced over his shoulder to his friend, then back at whatever Cody was up to. “...N’also cause we couldn’t gettim t’abuse his power without riskin’ his rep. Ain't gonna do that to a bro.”

Max snorted as Isabel gasped, wiping a fake tear from her eye. “Aw, does someone have a heart?” She teased, heels off the ground, and leaned up to rest an elbow against his shoulder. “Hey, since you’re so nice to your _buds_ can you let me sit on your shoulders again? Cause I can’t see anything but you can and we did earlier and it was great and I also just think you should.”

Johnny’s face went red. “Don’t-! Don’t _push it_ , Guerra.”

His eyebrow quirked as Max’s curiosity got the best of him, “Yeah actually- how’d you convince him the first time?”  
  
Isabel shrugged. “Climbed a lot of trees as a kid.”

The commotion at the head didn’t stop- whatever it was actually seemed to start affecting students further down the line. Several voices-

 _“Aw man these were brand new!”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Noo, I just did laundry yesterday!”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Quit worryin’. It’ll dry out eventually.”_

-bemoaned in woeful complaint. The heck, what? What’d they say? Max swore he heard some kid yell something about laundry. Was that supposed to mean... dirty clothes was Cody’s worst fear? He guessed that would add up, dude was super preppy, but it sounded kinda lame for some horrifying OP terror monster. Like, it couldn’t think of anything spookier than stinky socks?

Scratch that- Max had smelled his Dad’s socks. He takes it back, Cody. He’s sorry. Forgive him.

But still, so the thing came out and was like… A giant sock puppet? Did Cody get freaked over sock puppets? Now marionettes Max could understand, and don’t even get him _started_ on ventriloquist dummies, but sock puppets weren’t really-

Whatever train of thought that was leading into promptly dissipated as his attention was snapped back by Johnny’s strangled yelp. He backed up several steps, head turned downward at the floor. Isabel gave him the same confused look as Max was before following suit, jumping slightly. What?

“Um, guys? What’s your proble-” The question was cut off as something ice-cold and sloshing hit his ankles. It was damp, instantly soaking into his socks and sticking the cuffs of his pants to his legs. It sucked, and Max did _not_ jump half a foot in the air and scream. That was someone _else_.

With the amount of students in front of them parted to avoid the same fate, Max finally had a clear view of the scene ahead-

It was _water_.

Water was leaking, pouring from every crack and crevice and gap and split in the wood it could find. It didn’t seem to be a small amount, either. That must have been what was making the doors bulge- _the whole freaking ocean-_ and the only thing holding it back being the wardrobe doors. 

Which had begun to fracture.

Max’s eyes flicked over to Cody, who looked like he was about to pass out. He was the closest out of everyone, mid-thigh deep in the stuff, and Max did _not_ envy him. If the dude got freaked over baths, then this was overkill.

The doors heaved one last time before splintering. If he’d been shadowed by the wardrobe before, Cody was nothing but an outline as what could only be described as a tidal wave smashed it’s captors straight off their hinges. It was _gigantic_. Rushing water nearly scraped the ceiling as it rose, growing massive until suspending itself in crest.

And just as quickly, it dropped. But Cody stood frozen.

Off in the crowd Max could’ve sworn he heard Violet yell. He didn’t blame her. He figured Cody had about negative two seconds before getting crushed by a bajillion tons of frothing seawater, taking the rest of the class with him. Even Professor Garcia had snapped to attention, rushing forward and towards the room’s head as the wall of liquid crashed down and, and-  
  
“R-RI _DDI_ KULUS,”  
  
**_SNAP_ **

-and. And,

And Cody was bulldozed by an absolutely outrageous number of plastic playpen balls. They rained with a vengeance, hundreds of terrifying multicolored spheres knocking him to his feet and covering him completely. 

Nobody spoke, every pair of eyes fixed on the ballpit ball mountain. Then, like something out of the crappy Halloween movies his family'd watch when Max was a kid, a hand broke the surface. A face followed it. Various plastic balls bounced to the floor as Cody slowly pushed himself up and out of his rainbow funfetti toned imprisonment. Static electricity had made it so several stuck to his now-floating black hair. 

Cody pulled his remaining leg free, but the momentum caused him to stumble forward. In an effort to catch himself one of his shoes caught a stray ball and slipped, Cody’s arms pinwheeling as he gave a strangled yelp. Max watched, helpless, as he fell backwards and back into the pile. 

Ballpit balls flew everywhere. And the whole class burst into hysterics.

Immediately the room felt brighter, roaring laughter forcing the boggart’s horrific McDonalds Playpen Nightmare to dissipate and whip back into the safety of it’s creep wardrobe. Fortunately magic had repaired the doors upon spellcasting, and they slammed shut with a loud _THUNK_ as soon as the creature was inside. 

_Un_ fortunately magic _didn’t_ repair the fabric on water-drenched student’s ankles. Which Max was one of. 

Cody laid sprawled on the floor. Slowly, his arm bent at the elbow and gave a weak thumbs up. Several _WHOOP WHOOP_ and _NICE ONE, JONES_ shot out from the crowd with another burst of giggles. From where he was standing Max could see Garcia sigh in relief, dragging a hand over his poorly hid smile. Their professor gave a worn side eye and a jerk of his head. A moment of confusion, then Isaac’s face broke into clarity and reddened as he scrambled forward to help get the younger boy standing.

Isaac offered his hand and Cody took it by the wrist, pulled forward in a daze. Except that they both moved too quick at the same wrong time, foreheads colliding and ricocheting painfully. 

Isabel snorted.

Both stumbled upright, clutching the front of their heads. There was some unheard exchange ending in a second mutual set of thumbs up, and Isaac hobbled back over to the Professor’s side.

Garcia waved the next student up as Cody’s blushing figure retreated. 

Across the room Lisa met him halfway, stepping to her brother's side. Max's hearing wasn't that great, and he didn’t speak Tagalog, but he assumed it was the usual _‘are you alright’_ post-boggart pep talk, which at this point half the class was receiving in their own small groups. 

He jumped as Lisa snapped, her usually calm demeanor dropping to yell something at Stephen about a traumatic childhood drowning experience. Stephen, who Max wouldn’t have been surprised if had been vocalizing some ridiculous _water-fear-erego-vampire_ theorizing, looked about to snap back before backing down at a pointed glance from Dimitri. Stephen sighed and appeared to grumble some apology, face red and scratching the back of his head.

As the scene died down Max was once again painfully aware of the squelching his shoes made. He shivered, lifting a sneaker up and grimacing. He shook it off. Water went everywhere. Oops.

“Aw- dude!” Isabel yelped, “Here, lemme see those-” She knelt down, wand out and pointed. Muttered something unintelligible. Made some weird complicated motion with her wand Max didn’t recognize. And grinned as the fabric began to steam itself dry. 

Relief flooded- _oops, sorry Cody-_ through his nerves as Isabel bounced back up to standing. “Cool, right? Hot-Air charm, it’s something I picked up while digging around the Alchemy archives a couple months ago. Y’never know what you’ll find in the library!” 

A Gryffindor boy was up next- hell if Max was paying attention, though. 

“Whuh- hey!” Johnny whined, “C’mon Guerra, ain’t very _Goody Two-Captain_ leavin’ your _Beater Bro_ out to not-dry.”

Isabel’s eyebrows shot up. “Ohhh no, you had your chance!” Her nose stuck up and arms crossed in defiance. “And- and _watch it_ with the _Captain_ junk, dweeblord. Maybe you should’ve lifted me up again earlier! But’cha didn’t, so now you’re wet _and_ dumb.” She turned, face obscuring what Max could see was a repressed curve at the corner of her mouth.

A cloud passed overhead, a warm beam of sun passing through the window and casting itself along the floor.

**_SNAP_ **

Gryffindor dude snapped his whatever demon into the freak box, and they stepped forward.

Johnny used the motion as an excuse to try and circle low back into Isabel’s vision, grinning. He caught her eye, and for a second and the smile she was trying to keep hidden broke loose. She bit her lip to force it back down and turned again. Johnny’s grin widened, before dropping as he put a hand to his forehead in faux pain. Max groaned. 

“Oh, damn,” And a Durmstrang student looked at them weird, “I’m shrivelin’ up like some creep mummy at bathtime... The cold’s... Givin’ me that freezy disease I dunno the name of but totally exists,” He rested an elbow on Isabel’s head, “I think I’m dyin,” Johnny looked trying not to crack up, “We gotta amputate maybe- _actually Puckett hold my water bottle I gotta have two arms for this-_ ” He shoved the plastic into Max’s hands before he could complain and threw his full weight against Isabel’s side, who shrieked with laughter. 

Make that four Durmstrang students looking at them weird. And two Beauxbatons students. And- oh, hey Isaac. Enjoying the show? Great. Cool. Fantastic.

One of the Durmstrang kids was up but Max was too busy holding this stupid water bottle to pay them any mind. Whups, sorry dude.

“IF ONLY,” Johnny’s weight was held up by two outstretched arms, “GUERRA KNEW SOME KINDA TRICK-"  
  
“I’ll drop you! I’ll drop you like the bunch of bricks you are and let you fall!!!”

“-T’HELP ME OUT,” Max looked across the room at the others. “LIKE MAYBE ONE'A THEM WIZARD SPELLS Y’LEARN FROM READIN’ NERD LIBRARY BOOKS,” All four were observing intently, and Max watched Ed and RJ share a look before handing Stephen and Ollie a couple sickles. “AN ALSO, wh- whUH- heyHEY,” He turned back just in time to see Isabel make good on her dropping promise, and to see Johnny fall butt first onto the floor. 

They shared a venomous glare. Then half a second later dissolved into a pair of giggling messes.

**_SNAP_ **

Oh, wow, was that a poodle? Great poodle, Durmstrang kid. They moved forward. Nearly at the front, only a few kids stood in front of them. 

Isabel knelt down, repeating her charm and grabbing Johnny’s hand to haul him up.

It was ridiculous, and they were ridiculous, but the goofy banter and the poorly hushed laughter and the unabashed positive presence filled the air with a warmth the room was naturally lacking. Maybe it was the boggarts influence that turned the floor to ice, that dimmed what little light the sconces could offer in place of sun, that picked at the back of his brain and made the hair on the back of his neck stand up. But Max had two overly ridiculous jocks as friends, so maybe it wasn’t so bad. 

He didn’t have to stand with them, he’d already gone, but it helped.

A bump hit him as Isabel hip-nudged, still goofy grinning, skirt fabric bunched up and working on drying herself. “Earth to Puckett? You never answered me earlier, y’know.”

Max raised an eyebrow. “Answered you? Uh, about what?” 

She sighed with a swift shake of her head. “ _About_ if you’re feeling alright after what must’ve been dysphoria’s playground. I mean it, you can tell me if you’re rattled, okay?”

He winced, giving an offhanded _yeah yeah I’m good whatever_ noise in lieu of an actual response, and glued his gaze to the front of the room. _Was_ he cool? No clue, but he wasn’t gonna think about that right now. Oh, how fascinating, a two-headed shark. Very creative, random classmate. Very impressive.

The last student in front of them in line stepped forward.

“Wow Isabel did you see that shark? What an excellent change of topic we can discuss.”

He looked back to his friend, whose eyes had softened.

A hand raised to rest on Max’s shoulder. “For real, doofus. I dont...” Isabel hesitated, wrestling with words. “I want you to... I want to be there if you’re not okay, okay? We’re friends. It's what we do. You know you can tell me if this bothers you, right?”  
  
His hand waved her off. “It’s cool, I’m Mr. Cool. Gosh Isabel, care to proofread my thesis paper? For my PhD in thermodynamics? Cause I’m working up to Doctor Cool. Give it a couple years.”

Isabel’s eyes narrowed, cheeks puffing out in annoyance. “Max. I’m serious.”

“Hi serious I’m seriously avoiding this conversationnnnnnn,”

Isabel relented, sighing. “Later?” She asked, and Max reluctantly hummed in agreement. That seemed to work enough, and she gave him a smile. He relaxed and gave her one back.

“Okay, cool.” She said, relenting in the face of her friend's discomfort. “You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. But I’m here if you _do_ want to, okay?” She stuck her tongue out at him. “I’m just worried, ya big jerk. We both are.” She looked pointedly at Johnny, who nodded and took the opportunity to swipe the plastic bottle back into his hands.

Max raised an eyebrow at her. “Um, how about worrying for yourself? Me aside, you saw what Cody went up against. That thing was freaky, dude. Like, ultimate bad time lottery. For bad times. The worst.”

He gave a wince, eyeing the chest as he shivered.

“That kid’s gonna goof their ghoul any second now. Garcias gonna get to you, and when he does, _you’re_ gonna be the one with the creepy doppelgänger telling you you’re dating Isaac.”

Isabel's face wrung up, Johnny choked on his water. 

She opened her mouth to retort, and-

**_SNAP_ **

-the giant worm inflated into one long balloon animal. Which then proceeded to pop a hole, and whizz itself pathetically back into the chest. 

The doors snapped shut. And nobody else was there to step forward.

Isabel shot him death glares as Garcia called her next into the queue, her pointed fingers flipping rapidly between their eyes in a very clear ‘ _I’m watching you and when this stupid class is over I’m gonna kick your dumb butt for even joking about that watch your back Puckett cause soon it’ll be on the dirt’_ nonverbal message. Max waved her off good naturedly with the tips of his fingers.

“Have fun with your ultimate bad time lottery!” He half shouted, the corners of his mouth turning up as he watched Isabel roll back on her heels, using her momentum to roll forward and blow a giant raspberry.

But then Isabel laughed, flashing him a reassuring smile and thumbs up. “Dude, I’ve _got_ this!” A challenge sparked in her eyes, a confident grin spreading across her face. “Whatever dumb things gonna come out of that wardrobes got nothin on me.” 

She strolled backwards to the front of the classroom as she talked, sunshine from the open shutters filtering through the floor in patches. Light gleamed off her hair, her surefire grin, the gold foil on her tie.

A couple surrounding students nudged each other, classmates _(house and school regardless)_ once lost in their own conversations now having their interest piqued. She’d never admit it, Max wasn’t even sure she was _aware_ of it, but Isabel had clout. When she did stuff? People paid attention. 

Banters continued to be passed back and forth, Isabel waving to get Eds attention from where they sat with Johnny’s other friends. _Make sure you’re paying attention, doofus!_ her smile seemed to say. She lit up when they waved back in confirmation, Ollie and RJ joining with encouraging thumbs up.

She was contagious and Max started to relax a bit. He brought his arm down, repressing a smile. 

“Hubris is the folly of the best Isabel, lest we forget mine lamest and most unbodaciously cowabummer of a first task.”

Isabel passed through a second patch of light, snorting. “Yeah, yeah! Don’t catch yourself crying cause I wrecked the Spooky Dark Arts Monster Of The Week and you had to be dragged away from it.” 

“Wh- Hey! I _literally_ kicked its butt!”

Next to him, Johnny shook his head. “Uncorrectamundo chum, y’kinda kicked it’s everywhere.”

“Johnny agrees with me!”

“UM? NO HE DIDNT? THATS NOT EVEN CLOSE TO WHAT THAT WAS?”

“KICK ITS ASS GUERRA”

Isabel burst out laughing as she shot Johnny a grin and a wink. She reached the head of the classroom, backlit by the last edge of sun. 

**Lock clicked.**

“Just you wait! Max, how much d’you wanna bet the same lame dog comes out huh?” She sighed, hands planted on her hips as she shook her head. “There’s no challenge to that, it’s boring. I’ve grown, I’m not thirteen anymore!”

Max gave her a thumbs down. “Oh, aren’t you? Sure fooled me, I could have sworn it was third year again.” 

A low whistle sounded next to him as Johnny shook his head. “Yowch. That one’s gonna be hard t’recover from.”

Isabel scoffed. “Hey Jhonny, how about some more of that backup?” Her arms folded in front of her chest, one hand jokingly flicking her wand their way.

**Old wood creaked.**

There was a wicked snort from Maxs side as Johnny gave an “Oh? Nice try Guerra, I got NO reason to take commands willy-nilly.”

“Except that maybe I’m your sports boss?” She stuck out her tongue.

Johnny placed both hands to his heart in mock subservience. “ _Well, oh Captain my Captain._ ”

**A hand pushed past the door; its firm, steady grip clutching the knob.**

Isabel's face tinted red, eyes darting across their classmates as she was barely able to stammer out a “Wh- _No_ you _dimrod!_ And- and would you _quit_ tossing the position name around like that!!”

“Ooh ouch, can’t have _The Position_ gettin disrespected, can we _Miss Captain?_ ”

“How about I give you an extra 20 laps during practice and then we see how smart you think you are, _Mister Beater?_ ”

**A shape, barely even a solid form, moved itself out of the wardrobe. Its movements were steady and slow, the authority of something that knew power.**

Johnny looked as though he was going to retort, before catching sight of the emerging figure. The following quiet caught Isabel by surprise, expecting at least Max to give her something to work with.

When he didn’t, Isabel paused. She gave him a moment, maybe she thought he was thinking of a comeback, but at their combined lack of a response she let out another cheerful grin and an exasperated laugh.

“Wow, speechless already? I knew I was good, but that's next level!”

**Max watched as its shadow passed over Isabel, the immense semi-translucent figure blocking whatever remaining patch of sun she’d been at the edge of.**

Despite the shift, she didn’t seem to notice.

“Haha, uh, guys? You’re kiiiinda leaving me hangin here?” She gave a soft shake of her head and a _tsk_. “Dudes, for real. Not cool. _Not cool._ ” 

**A ghost? But- Isabel wasn’t afraid of ghosts. He’d seen her make kind and friendly conversation with the castle spectres dozens of times. But then why would this be any-**

“C’mon, giving up? I thought we had a pretty good back and forth thing going on, but, if you forfeit to me I accept my win graciously.”

**Max's eyes widened. His head whipped around to see that Ed's face had drained of its color, their hand clinging to RJ’s with an iron grip. When he looked back, Isabel's good natured grin had faded.**

She frowned. “Uh… guys? Seriously for real are you like, oka-”

**A firm, impatient clearing of the throat cut her off. The noise pierced the classroom, successfully silencing even students it was not intended for. In the fearful newfound silence, all anyone could do was stare.**

Her face broke into clarity. They weren’t looking _at_ her. 

**The figure's arms were immense, crossed aggravatedly over its chest. Despite its shifting, gossamer-esque body, its presence was concrete, agitated, and allowed none of the prior light to pass through. Each passing second seemed to whittle it’s patience, as though it had already given so much and was beginning to wear thin.**

They were looking _behind_ her.

**A shock of white was the only hair on its face, which sat in an unyielding scowl. It was hard and honed, with translucent skin wrinkled and aged beyond time. If facial creases on most living beings indicated an elderly fragility, these were nothing of the sort. They were proof of survival, of longevity. They were worn as battle scars.**

**They were earned.**

She turned, gazing up.

**Strict, irritated eyes stared back at her from nearly twice her height. Her boggart's head was held high, body language commanding the attention of the room and its inhabitants. It moved forward, gliding across cold stone with an eerie grace. Those in the front stepped back, a chilling combination of fear and respect surrendered without demand. It was just the two of them, now.**

**It's only draping trailed along the floor behind it, enveloping the sturdy arms and fluffed neck in a clean, white bathrobe.**

Her eyes widened.

**When it spoke, the sound was gruff and low. It cut like glass, all the cold of winter mornings, the frostbite and the frozen cheeks, with none of the warm drinks or comforting blankets that made it enjoyable. All the searing heat of summer, the sweat and the exhaustion, and none of the soft breezes or caught breath to make it survivable.**

**Already the glower it wore was grating, an amalgam of impatient apathy and degrading impatient irritability. Yet Max watched as its glare intensified, honing onto the girl that suddenly stood so small before it.**

**“Isabel.”**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [isaac voice] uh oh sisters!
> 
> 1) yes stephen has lit isaacs hair on fire. no we will not see stephens boggart (or anyone after isabels for that matter) but for the record it is david duchovny. not fox mulder, real man david duchovny telling him fox mulder is a character on tv and the x files arent real  
> 2) yes isaac has written self insertxsasuke enemies to lovers domestic Parks And Recreation AU fanfiction starring him and sasuke from hit anime borutos dad  
> 3) yes isabels about to have a Real Bad Time
> 
> that aside! i'm moving forward with some other fics before updating this one next. this is technically the third fic in the series and it makes no sense to write it backwards so i'm gonna try and get at least one of the first two up before posting chapter 3. it doesn't help that i have the majority of chapter 4 written but a only couple paragraphs for ch3. sorry for the cliffhanger! hold tight, itll be here before you know it.
> 
> i also just want to take a break bc this is 12 fucking k and i want to try and train myself to be more succinct- so i'm taking AU drabble requests for fun!! this AU does have a timeline that i want to adhere to, but if you have a scene u wanna see thats nonspecific and can just be inserted anywhere hmu at https://isabelguerra.tumblr.com/ask !! ex. like uhhhh idk 'what does everyone smell in amormentia' 'when did stephen light isaacs hair on fire' 'how did max fall in that acromantula pit' 'what are quidditch practices like' 'who was captain before isabel' etc etc. ok thats all thanks for reading!! <333 love 2 hear what u think


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